In episode #1 we mentioned that there is one thing which can prevent us from developing a habit of learning. But first, I wish to share a story.
A plastic surgeon shared his experiences with many of his patients. A large percentage of successful facial makeovers fail due to an interesting phenomena. Even when surgery and results are stunning a percentage of women find the results not only unsatisfactory but totally not effective. The doctor, friends and photo evidence shows the remarkable results. But, the patient simply does not see any difference.
After many years and countless situations like above, the doctor said that he fully understands what is happening. A large percentage of patients have a permanent mental image of themselves which cannot be changed. Early in their lives they took on and accepted that they were not beautiful. More than that, that they were ugly. No amount of outward changes could alter their “self image. Many of us suffer from a similar self image. We cannot shake the lifetime of negative self messages.
OK, this is not about your face. It is about your self messages concerning your ability to learn. It goes beyond your self image. The world, in general, tells you the same thing. You are not worthy, you are a failure because you have not learned something (English) to an acceptable level. This attitude is a killer for any further learning in your life. Many of you actually already know enough words and grammar to pass a test which the average American would fail.
Today we ask you to set aside some time for several days. Settle your mind and emotions. Reach deep inside and look at that self image of a learning failure. Talk to that sad child-like person inside and tell a different story. Below is a music video that may help. You must fully embrace the sadness and fear, acknowledge it and begin to replace the lie with a new and reasonable truth.
ACTION STEP Have several nice long talks with yourself. Can you reach an agreement with that inner person? Or can you reach a compromise about the chances that maybe you are able to become successful? Meditate, pray or whatever you call it and paint a new image in your mind’s eye. Writing won’t help. You need to visualize a happy and successful English speaker. The clearer your internal picture, the better. Can you imagine that person also talking with cool and happy people , maybe on a beach somewhere? Can you feel the strong emotions of joy, love and acceptance? You need a strong image to fight the old one, but it can be done. I know who you really are and so does your God. Know who you really have the potential to be.
Now, and for the rest of your life, every time you feel that “loser” message, stop what you are doing and pull up that positive picture, the smells, the scenery and the good feelings. Over time you will replace the lie with a wonderful new you… inside and out.
I know this sounds crazy. Please, give this one idea a chance. You are more special than you give yourself credit for. Quit fighting yourself and believe in your ability to learn.
Today’s author is George, he teaches spoken English in live-online classes at the My ESL Friends – Edupunk English Course.
- Last Week: English KISS Episode 1 – Easy is a Habit
- Next Week: English KISS Episode 3 – I hate Grammar
Title Music by: Lasswell | BeeKoo
Picture by: Pragathish | Loser